Anger: distance first, repair later
How anger builds in a chain, why you should step in early, and how to repair afterwards.
The anger chain
Anger usually builds in a chain: a trigger, a thought about it, a rise in the body, then action. The earlier in the chain you step in, the easier it is.
Get distance
Take a time-out before the peak. Leave the room, walk, breathe. Don't try to sort things out at the peak. You can come back to the conversation when you're steadier.
Repair
Come back later to repair: own your part, and say what you'll do differently. Understanding anger never excuses harm. You're responsible for what you do with it.
Put it into practice
THE Habit Breaking App turns this into daily check-ins, urge tools and a plan that fits you. Free to start.
More guides
- The habit cycle: why you keep doing it
- The needs pyramid: what is your habit doing for you?
- Thinking traps that make urges louder
- Guilt vs shame: why it matters for breaking a habit
- After a slip: how to get back up without starting from zero
- Phone, social media and gaming: add friction
- Gambling: put barriers in place
- Alcohol and drugs: stay safe while you change
- Procrastination: the tiny first step
- Rebuilding self-respect, one kept promise at a time
This guide is general information, not medical advice. If you're not safe, call 999 or Samaritans on 116 123.